In his Lady's Service
by c-wolf
Summary: Xander. Based around 24 hours after the zombie bomb episode. Give or take a day. NOW COMPLETED Thought it was before.. but I left a chunk missing and didn't realize till later. This should cover it.
1. Default Chapter

Going for a random twist on a crossover here. Who me?  
  
Ms. Harris found herself sober on a rare occasion. It was at that point that she realized something that she should have long ago. Alexander had, for a few years, been behaving in a similar manner to an old friend. It was just enough to jolt her mind into gear. With tears in her eyes, she picked up the phone and dialed as her son ran out of the house. He had bruises from his father. Someone picked up on the other end of the line.  
  
"Universal Imports."  
  
- - - - - - - - - -  
  
Xander spent the night in the library.  
  
"Xander, what are you doing here?" Giles asked, exhasperated when he found the young man camped out in the periodical's section.  
  
"Fell asleep reading." Xander said grinning. Everyone was still hiding things from him, but he got around it by keeping his ears to the town.  
  
Giles sighed then walked back downstairs. He had to find that ritual. Then he paused. It was right before his eyes. "How'd I miss it?"  
  
Xander grinned morbidly. If they didn't try to hide things from him so hard, they would've noticed that several key pieces of information just happened to appear on the table when he stumbled into it on occasion. But, they had other things on their minds. It didn't matter though. He'd stopped the zombies from triggering the bomb. He would always be available if they needed him again. After all, as he occasionally joked, he was in His Lady's service.  
  
"Are you going to stay there all day?"  
  
"Nah, G-man. I'm going on a doughnut run, want any?"  
  
Giles sighed. "I wish you'd stop calling me that. And no, I don't need any doughnuts."  
  
Xander grinned, and walked out.  
  
- - - - - - - - -  
  
If he timed it just right, dear old dad would have left for work. Then all he would have to do was avoid his drunk mom. As he neared the house however, he noticed an interesting sight. His father was leaning against a black Mercedes Benz, with his hands behind his back. Two other cars of the same make were parked nearby.  
  
"Great, what now?"  
  
Off to the side, was his mother. Strangely, she seemed to be sober and in full control of her mouth if nothing else. Standing in front of her was an immaculately dressed black haired man. As he neared, he heard strange words.  
  
"It's been a long time, MoneyPenny."  
  
"Too long, James. Far too long..." Then she saw Xander. "I.... This is my son. He's why I called. My husband and I are a danger to him. For his own good, keep us away. Take care of him for me." Then she picked up the things she'd packed, and walked toward the other Mercedes.  
  
The man known as James looked at her with sorrow tinged eyes. "All you ever needed to do was ask. When have I ever denied you?"  
  
She hesitated, then looked away. "Alex has the look you used to get. I have the feeling he needs some... special attention. I trust you will take care of that? Maybe bring Uncle Q in? Something tells me he's been dabbling in your line of work." Mrs. Harris then got into the car, and it pulled away.  
  
Mr. Harris started cussing and yelling. "Where is that..."  
  
James stalked forward and hit him, breaking his nose. "Take him away. I don't care where."  
  
"Of course, 007." Said one of the figures, that Xander hadn't noticed coming up behind him. Mr. Harris was shoved, yelling, into the back seat. The car drove off. Only one was left. Xander and the man who was either James or 007 whatever that meant, stared at each other in silence. 


	2. issues

They stared for a full minute, until Xander smirked. "Well, we could give each other the silent treatment out here, or go inside and do the same over a sandwich. Coming?" He walked toward the front door.  
  
James followed, after pressing a series of buttons on his keychain. Xander blinked, but didn't comment. As they walked in, he thought about what his mother had said. Then, he thought about why exactly he was so willing to invite a stranger in.  
  
- - - - - - - -  
  
Xander sighed. "Well, we have moldy bread, not so moldy bread, and something that looks like alfalfa. Ah the wonders of fine cuisine. We also have a fine selection of alcohol for the beer guzzling buffoons that visit occasionally. I'm afraid that if we had any menus, they gained sentience and flew away screaming." He grinned at James nervously. The guy hadn't spoken yet. "Any ideas?"  
  
"One, you don't have a reason to be nervous around me, yet. Two, I always have a meal or two stored away in the car. I'll go get it, then we can talk." James got up and walked out.  
  
Xander set about cleaning the kitchen table. Not that it really needed it. Despite Mom's drunkenness, she still kept the kitchen clean. She did it for appearances sake of course.  
  
Bond walked back in, with a picnic basket of all things. Xander almost laughed. Here was a guy in an expensive tailored suit carrying a basket as if it were fine china. Everything was set out. Xander blinked. "Okay. Giles is English, but I have yet to see him eating... what is all this anyway?"  
  
"I had a couple of acquaintances make Baked Alaska, some fine tea that I can't remember the name of right now, and a fine cheesecake. They delivered it to the special storage unit I have in the car."  
  
Xander blinked. "You knew already?"  
  
"Of course. Though at the time I was actually thinking that dinner with MoneyPenny was possible."  
  
"Funny, I always knew her as Mom or Carlotta. By the way, I got the impression you represent some kind of government organization. What specifically do you do?  
  
"I'm what is known to some as a secret agent. A member of British MI-6 to be more exact. My classification as 007 was recently reactivated."  
  
"And 007 is?"  
  
"I'm licensed to kill."  
  
"Ok..."  
  
"I have a couple of questions for you, Alex?"  
  
"Call me Xander."  
  
Bond nodded. "Penny seemed to think that you dabble in my line of work. What exactly do you do? And keep in mind that I'm good at keeping secrets."  
  
Xander thought for a minute. James had an attentive look on his face, which was a switch. His friends tended to zone out. "Where do I start? With a blond teenage girl with super strength, and healing, who has saved the world a lot? Or the fact that she was destined to die a while back, and I resuscitated her. Which I might add, caused her to be able to save the world. Or would you like me to explain how I saved my friends and in essence the world, by scaring a bad guy into disabling the bomb he'd set?"  
  
"That's not the end of it is it? From what little I understand, Sunnydale isn't exactly your normal hotbed of crime. Was the term "Mouth of Hell" a label that someone put on it to keep out the tourists?"  
  
Xander sighed. "Which do you want? The truth, or the extremely scary truth?"  
  
"Which one's easier to believe?"  
  
"The extreme one. It's getting the proof that scares the crap out of you."  
  
"Let's go for the proof first, then worry about the rest."  
  
"On one condition."  
  
"Yes?"  
  
"My town, my command. Mom wants you to train me, fine. You will probably even command me during that. Again, fine. But in order to get the proof, you have to follow my instructions. It's what I know best. It'll keep you alive."  
  
- - - - - - -  
  
Xander contemplated the equipment.  
  
"One: You'll need at least one bladed weapon, not throwable. However, you can carry one of that sort as backup if need be. If your aim is good, it'll probably help. Two: Around four sharpened pieces of wood, better known as stakes. Personally, for the bladed, a hand axe or battle axe. Hacking away at anything, is preferable to finesse. Tends to shock them. Don't worry about being seen with it... the police avoid the night. So do most of the average criminal elements for that matter."  
  
"Gun?"  
  
"To temporarily disable, fine by me. If you use it only to kill however, it would be safer to leave it here. Bullets, either make things laugh or annoy them in this town." Xander sighed. "Buffy would probably find the strongest example and watch you almost die at it's hands before stepping in. Me, we'll find the strongest that you can believe, but easy to kill. It's hard enough taking the truly powerful on when the world's about to go up in flames."  
  
- - - - - - - -  
  
"First stop, Willy's. It'll give you a chance to see some of the things we'll find, without risking death in the process. It's a no attack zone. Plus, I've got a bit of information I need to check up on."  
  
Xander had a random assortment of items on himself, yet managed to look like it was comfortable.  
  
Bond had taken out an overcoat from his car, and concealed the axe inside. It had a rip away side over the weapon, so he could get it out quickly. The coat also had a thin layer of material similar to a bulletproof vest. He could remove it quickly as well. Q had even been amused enough to put a self destruct device inside it and line the coat with a special form of plastique. Just in case. The stakes had been put in a modified spring loader, which usually housed a couple of knives. Xander didn't need to know about the explosives yet.  
  
When they entered the bar, several customers glanced at Xander before hiding their heads. Willy flinched, but smiled. "What can I get for you two?"  
  
"Information for one. Two, if there's someone in here nastier than normal I want to take it out."  
  
"Nothing that nasty... there are a couple of vampires that have been hanging at the new bar lately. Tough customers that lot."  
  
Xander nodded. "I believe I said two things?"  
  
Willy flinched again. "The ritual is specific. It requires the blood of a slayer, and a coward."  
  
"What, no hero this time?"  
  
"The Wording was specific."  
  
"Fine." Xander placed down a wad of cash. "Spend it on things I approve of, or you'll see how truly nasty I can get." Xander grinned. Willy picked the money up and backed away slowly, nodding his head the whole way.  
  
As they walked out, Bond grabbed Xanders arm. "Vampires?"  
  
"That's where we're headed. Stake to the heart, beheading, or fire. Anything else tickles them."  
  
- - - - - - -  
  
Buffy was walking toward the bar, when she saw a man in an overcoat stake a vampire. She saw another figure, but it wasn't until he staked the second vamp and turned around that she realized he was Xander.  
  
"I thought I told you to stay out of things! I can't keep you safe if you won't listen!" She yelled, while ignoring the man in the overcoat.  
  
Xander stared sadly at her. "I was on my own before you got into town, Buffy. It's a wonder I didn't get bitten and turned during that time. I didn't even know vampires existed till you showed up."  
  
"Your parents..."  
  
"Were drunk, and my father was abusive. I slept in abandoned buildings sometimes. At least now that I know Giles, I can read by osmosis each night I lay my head on a dictionary in the library."  
  
"Still..."  
  
"Buffy, I've saved your tail more times than you will ever know. And considering how close you came those times, I hope you never find out. It would throw you off your game. And, while we're on the topic, did you forget that Willow and I with Giles helping continued to patroll Sunnydale while you went on your hiatus after Angel went through the portal?"  
  
Buffy stared at him in shock.  
  
Xander grinned. "Close your mouth, the flies are flying in to roost."  
  
Buffy glared. "Willow wants you out of it too. She doesn't want to lose you."  
  
"And I don't want to lose her, which is why I still do this. A world without Willow is a world that I don't want to live in. It is for her that I do what I do. It is in Her Service that I act." 


	3. Revelations of a zeppo

Thanks for the reviews.. as to how many chapters. So far I've done one a day. But it's nearing crunch time which will cause me to slow down and actually try to think instead of letting the story take on fully a life of it's own.

Five vampires walked around the corner as Xander finished speaking. As they did, Buffy screamed in frustration. They turned right around and went back the way they came. James of course noticed it, as well as the pale complexions.  
  
"I think you just scared away your prey, Miss Summers." He deadpanned, without any sign on his face that he was anything but serious.  
  
She glared. "We'll talk later!" Then she grabbed her stake and tore off after the reluctant vampires.  
  
"Well, I'm afraid I couldn't get you any proof of her strength... unless a scream counts as a superhuman ability." Xander sighed. "Might as well beat her to the punch, and walk toward Giles. If we don't, she'll head up a search party to drag me there."  
  
- - - - - - - - -  
  
They walked into the library, and found Giles and Willow researching.  
  
"Xander! We were, looking over a report I need tomorrow. Things are kind of slow."  
  
Xander glanced at James, then shrugged. "I didn't know they did book reports on the Frawee ritual. However, since you are doing one. Willy gave me this unique little tidbit. It seems that it requires the blood of a slayer and a coward." He then grinned at Willow and G-man's shocked expressions.  
  
Buffy walked in at that point, and froze. "Ah... Giles... looking like a fish doesn't suit you."  
  
Giles closed his mouth and adjusted his glasses. Then opened it again, when Xander spoke once more.  
  
"As I was trying to sleep here last night, I heard you mumbling. So I searched while you slept. I kind of thought you'd appreciate the information being right where you needed it. So I put it on the table for you."  
  
Giles sighed. "We agreed..."  
  
"Not me. Not ever. If you insist on excluding me, I now have access to resources that will allow me to have a library with the same books that you have. Unless you want me to save your rears without you ever knowing where I am or what I'm doing, live with it."  
  
Willow paled. "Xander..."  
  
"Willow... ask Buffy to repeat what I told her. If she can't, I will. Personally I think you'd probably handle it better from her right now."  
  
Bond looked at the faces before him. These were the ones that the Human race depended on? How in the heck did they ever succeed?  
  
Oz walked in at that point.  
  
"Hi Oz." Xander said.  
  
Oz looked at him. "You're back. Cool." Then he walked over to Willow and kissed her on the forehead.  
  
"OZ, tell him he's in danger if he sticks around us.  
  
Oz furrowed his eyebrows. "Why?" Then he walked over to the teapot and poured some for himself.  
  
Even Xander was in shock at that response.  
  
"Because we don't want him hurt..."  
  
"This is the Hellmouth, Willow." Said Oz, then he stopped speaking.  
  
Xander shook his head. "You never cease to amaze me." Then he smacked his head. "I almost forgot. This is James Bond. He's a friend of my mothers." Then he decided to wait to tell the full story. "She decided to have my father arrested for abuse, then informed James that her alcoholism was endangering me. Then she left. From the looks of it, he's now my legal guardian."  
  
Then he almost bust his gut laughing at the expressions on everyone's faces including Oz. The normally unshakeable werewolf had spewed tea all over Buffy.  
  
Bond was about to speak, when his phone rang. He answered.  
  
Xander and the rest tensed up as they saw the look on his face. Without a word, they started grabbing various weapons. Then they waited for James to speak.  
  
- - - - - - - - - -  
  
Mr. Harris trembled in the back of the car. He might have been many things, but brave was not one. The speed that his wife's friend hit him with, scared him more than he could ever admit. And to think he liked the philosophy that cowards sometimes lived longer.  
  
The driver glanced at the speedometer. When he looked back up he blanched at the sight of an eighteen wheeler bearing down on him. He spun the wheel and hit the brakes. Then he hit reverse.  
  
The truck slammed into the car and spun it around. Three figures jumped out. The driver crawled out noticing that the figures were spread out strategically. He drew his gun. Something grabbed his head from behind. He never felt his face get ripped off.  
  
His partner witnessed it, and while grabbing a weapon managed to press the alert button. As it was pressed, something smashed through the window and grabbed him. He was dragged out, screaming as the glass sliced through several vital organs. Then the three figures that he'd seen coming forward bent over. The last thought he had was "How can their teeth be so long?"


	4. Preparations

Bond looked at Xander and his friends. The information he'd just received suggested that it would be more in their line of work than his.  
  
"The two agents that took your father are dead. He's nowhere to be found. The driver's face was ripped off by an unknown force. The other was drained of blood, after being ripped out of the car through a broken window. I have no doubts that this is in your area of expertise, but allow me to call in support for you. We can have some lethal weapons here in about 4 hours."  
  
Xander glared. "For my father you mean?"  
  
"Doesn't he fit the bill of a coward?"  
  
Buffy looked at the two. "I appreciate the assistance, but I think we can handle things."  
  
Giles sighed. "Not this time Buffy. It's your blood that will be the other half of the ritual."  
  
- - - - - - -  
  
Faith walked out of the hotel and started on her patrol. As she did, a group of shadows followed along behind her.  
  
When she got to the graveyard, she found a few fledglings.  
  
"Well, looks like it won't be quiet after all. Looks like fun." As she dusted them, the figures came up behind her. She turned around.  
  
"What the..."  
  
The figures left, leaving an empty graveyard.  
  
- - - - - -  
  
Xander looked at Giles in disbelief. "Forgotten that you have a second slayer in town already have you? It did say A slayer's blood, not THE slayers blood after all."  
  
"Dear Lord." Giles exclaimed.  
  
"It shouldn't be too hard to find them. I left a tracer on Mr. Harris. I've always found it to be standard procedure on missions... just in case." Bond spoke, as he started dialing the contact number for Q.  
  
Xander walked over to the phone and called Willy.  
  
"Willy's land of lunacy."  
  
"Funny. Tell me something. Answer correctly by the way, and you'll find something nice in your stocking."  
  
"Lay it on me X-man."  
  
"How many times... wait a minute, got hit by de-ja-vu." Xander shook his head as he looked at Giles who just stared in befuddlement. "Here's the question, Willy. What's the time frame on the Frawee ritual? How long do we have?"  
  
"Four hours."  
  
"Oh is that all." Xander said sarcastically. "And here I thought we could sleep on it." He then slammed the phone down.  
  
"We have four hours. Can your friend get here in time, Bond?"  
  
"He's thirty minutes out. He did mention that he hasn't reported my apparent psychosis to my superiors. He has several devices that can be used though that wasn't their original purposes. By the way, can you drive stick or straight?"  
  
"Um... unless you want the engine destroyed, I'll stick with automatic."  
  
"He'll be delivering to the warehouse a block from here."  
  
- - - - - - - -  
  
Willow, Oz, and Giles with the assistance of Angel went to find Faith. They promised to be at the warehouse in time. They were, but Faith wasn't with them.  
  
"We checked all her usual hunting grounds, no go."  
  
Xander started pacing. "She'd be at least safer right now if you had found a place for her to call home instead of that rat hole of a hotel, G-man. As much as I hate laying blame, it's on your head." As he said that, the truck pulled in. Two vehicles were rolled out.  
  
"Sweet!" Which one's mine?"  
  
Q blinked. "Uh... 007?"  
  
"Don't worry Q, this is the one I told you about."  
  
"Oh great, looks like we're doubling the car insurance again."  
  
- - - - - - -  
  
"Ok Double O Seven, pay attention. You too youngsters."  
  
"Hey, we resemble that remark!" yelled Xander.  
  
Q groaned. "Against my judgement, I designed these on your specifications 007. Though I find it hard to believe that vampires and demons exist."  
  
"I already have a general assortment of weapons for dealing with them. We just need something that can improve the odds."  
  
"Well... we've had success with creating a hand laser similar to the power of the rifles we used back during the Moonraker fiasco. However, they will burn out at 5 shots. I've brought 10. Also, I have your general assortment of lockpicks etc. As for the vampires, I have some specialized crossbows. They will strap to your wrist, and have a 15, stake was it, load out. The bows are a fraction the size you're used to. We have targets for you to practice on. I have 8 reloads for each. Each stake is barbed, to prevent the vampire from getting it out in time. If you have anyone that can hit the heart with great accuracy, this is your best bet. I've brought some belts to carry the loads. Also, these are plastique lined with a 30 second fuse. All you have to do is press this button. It's situated where you won't be able to do so unless you remove the belt first. It can only respond to the heat of human flesh, so you won't trigger it by falling or being hit there. Double 0 Seven already has the special overcoat I designed on a humorous whim. The explosives in it are more pronounced. Also, on a pure whimsy, I created some special devices that shower a three foot area with holy water. Similar in activation to a grenade."  
  
Bond blinked. "And you did this despite the fact you didn't believe?"  
  
"Actually, I was amused by the myth one night... never mind. It was a while ago. Let's just say that nobody saw me make them. Oh, one more thing. I've brought two shotguns along. I assume you and and your protégé know how to use them? They have some special ammo that would be of some use. Standard loadout. Aim for the heart or above. Wasn't able to improve the reload on them though. So if you're in a hairy situation, use the other items."  
  
Everyone looked over the equipment with pure shock, except for Buffy. She was in weapon heaven.  
  
"Now, and what do I call your young protégé 007?"  
  
Giles blinked. "Protégé?'  
  
Xander looked at him. "Yep, he's going to teach me how to be even harder to kill. Though I do assure you, I do try at times to laugh at danger and run from it."  
  
"He's called Xander. Believe it or not, he's got some talents that rival mine. Pretty good considering he's picked them up as he went along."  
  
"Ah. Well, anyway. Both cars have a similar design. They are both capable of high speed. They have shatter and bulletproof shielding. There are missile launchers front and back, as well as a standard surface to air defense. I've modified it to use for ground as well. It has the same ammo load out that the shotguns have. However, if you come up against something other than vampire, we have some specialized armor piercing mini-rounds that you can switch the guns to. I've also installed a flamethrower attachment. In addition, I've created an electric shock defense system. It won't kill what you're going up against, but what happened to the agents, won't happen to you. Also, on a side note, I've installed the remote control device that 007 has used before. Now then, while you and 007 start learning the systems, your friends will learn how to use these devices properly."  
  
"Did you get the scanner?"  
  
"Ah yes. Here it is."  
  
Bond looked at it. The glowing dot from the tracer was bright. They were two miles from it. He matched it to the GPS system. The enemies were at some old mansion. 


	5. How to frazzle a vampire The tone was s...

Forgot to include the disclaimer. I do not own Buffy or James Bond.  
  
(Just for mentioning: In my head, the guy who is Q in this story, is Desmond Llewelyn who played Q throughout most of the James Bond series up until he died after finishing in The World is Not Enough. He was the only constant in the series. All the other characters were replaced at various times. He was and will always be the only Q in my mind. Also, I apologize for goofing up in chap. 1. It was supposed to be "Universal Exports"...)  
  
Bond and Q stood on the sidelines watching the squabbling teens, a quiet Oz, and one very frazzled librarian as they tested out different items.  
  
"It's my turn at the crossbow!"  
  
"You have your own!"  
  
"Oh come on Giles, let me test the holy water grenade."  
  
"How many times do I have to tell you, aim for the target not me!" yelled an exasperated tech as he was being rolled away on a stretcher. He'd just gotten hit in the rear with a stake.  
  
"So Q, which is worse... dealing with me or them?"  
  
"At least they're less destructive."  
  
**BANG  
**  
"Xander!"  
  
"Angel?"  
  
"Then again."  
  
"I wonder if we shouldn't send some videos of this to M as a gag gift..."  
  
"Grow up Double O Seven."  
  
- - - - - - -  
  
"We have the location. Does everyone have their weapons?" Bond asked, looking around.  
  
Willow, Giles, and Buffy had finally completed the checks on the crossbows. Since the hand they used most often was for stakes, their other arm was where the crossbows were attached. It'd been decided that the laser pistols would be a last resort. Angel was cowering in a closet.  
  
"Aw, come on Angel, I didn't mean to fire the missile. "How was I to know it locked on to the first target in the crosshairs. It was a good thing you leaped behind that crate when you did wasn't it... Angel?"  
  
Bond blinked. "Giles? I think that either you should drive the car, or Xander should. For this mission anyway. I don't think he'll be able to focus on both the weapons and the driving. I'll train him on that aspect later."  
  
A singed Angel stalked out of the closet, and grabbed his weapons. He glared at Xander. "I distinctly remember Q telling you that!"  
  
Xander grinned. "Oh come on, if it was on purpose you'd be dust."  
  
"And on that note..." Willow said. "Shouldn't we get going?" Then she saw everyone staring at her. "Oh come on, I only hit him in the rear once!"  
  
- - - - - -  
  
It was one hour before the ritual was to begin. Faith had just woken up and looked around.  
  
"What is this a monk convention?" she asked as a bunch of figures in black capes with hoods over their faces walked around her and a bound man, chanting.  
  
Mr. Harris came to, and started cussing.  
  
Faith rolled her eyes. "Please, I cuss better than that in my sleep."  
  
"Listen you little..."  
  
"SILENCE!"  
  
"Why are we tied up anyway?"  
  
"To drain your blood." One of the figures growled. "A slayer and a coward, will provide the strength to open the doors and the fear for Him to have his first meal. Fear is his food. And the world will be his feast!"  
  
"Who writes your speeches?"  
  
(There is more to write, but I threw the tone completely out of whack when I put comedy in. I'm working on the next chapter, and should have it ready by the end of today.) 


	6. Engagement

"Good luck Double O Seven. By the way, the arrangements you asked me to make are in place." Q said as he got into the truck and they drove off.  
  
Xander looked at him. "What arrangements?"  
  
"It's not important right now."  
  
Everyone got into the cars. Xander took the drivers seat, Giles took weapons control. Willow and Oz sat in the back. Bond took the drivers seat in the other, Angel controlled the weapons. Buffy sat in the back looking angry.  
  
"Why can't I sit in the weapons seat?"  
  
"With all the vampire and demon killing stuff that'll be flying around, I'll be safer in here."  
  
Both cars tore out of the warehouse and sped down the street toward the enemy. Xander, contrary to his hyperactive actions during training was subdued and focused. He turned on the communications.  
  
"Bond, or is it Double 0. What the heck am I..."  
  
"Whichever you choose."  
  
"Right. This mansion we're going to... I only know of one in Sunnydale, and this isn't it. And we've been through every inch."  
  
Giles looked over. He'd already got the ingredients together to cancel out the ritual if it started. Bond was also field medical trained for emergencies. "I didn't really think about it, but you're right."  
  
Giles had also brought along some supplies to do a spell similar to a passive radar scan. He started preparing.

"Giles you do know you're on weapons control don't you?"

"I trust you."

"Hitting the one mile mark."  
  
"Dear Lord...."  
  
"Um... Bond, Giles just did his standard Oh Crap maneuver. Better have the weapons ready." Xander said as Giles was still wiping his brow. "I've switched the front guns to armor piercing." All it would take was one flip to turn back to vamp kill mode.  
  
"Understood."

A short time later. "Gate in sight."  
  
"On my mark, fire missiles. 3, 2, 1." Both vehicles fired and blew the gates open, then they charged through.  
  
"Mixture of vamp and demon incoming. Can't tell what kind of demon." Xander slowed, and slewed left then right, spraying all within the area. Bond duplicated the maneuver.  
  
"Where did you pick that up Xander?" Bond asked.  
  
"Gotta love video games."  
  
They accelerated and tore up the hill on either side of the steps leading up. Giles spoke up. "I've got a read on Faith, don't know about Mr. Harris though. She's thirty feet inside the building. Looks like at least one wall between her and the front."  
  
Angel responded by firing more missiles. The door and half the front blew back. They stopped just short of sitting inside the building. Everyone got out. Xander and Bond had the shotguns, and immediately took out the hooded figures that charged toward them.  
  
"What kind of ammo did Q say this was anyway?" Xander asked as he looked at the smoking ruin of the figures.  
  
"Let's get Faith first. I'll explain later."  
  
The chanting grew louder as they ran forward. Several vampires ran out. Willow, Oz, and Buffy fired their crossbows. Willows aim was haphazard. One of her targets would have liked her to be a marksman though... even the undead hurt when they're hit between the legs.  
  
Bond, Xander, and Angel switched to the lasers as they charged in. The robed figures fell one by one.  
  
"Bout time you guys got here. I was getting bored."  
  
"Can't have that, can we faith?" Xander asked grinning as he cut her loose. "Did they succeed with the blood?"  
  
"Yes..."  
  
"Where are they?"  
  
Willow followed Giles directions and started scanning. Giles started performing the counter spell. It wouldn't last long if they didn't stop the ceremony.  
  
"He's in the basement."  
  
"Surprise surprise. Seems like we're always going after a bad guy in a basement." Xander commented morbidly. He then reloaded his shotgun.  
  
"Got any ideas on what Bond and I should do when we get down there?"  
  
"We're slayers, Xander, it's our job."  
  
"And it's your blood that will destroy the world, or whatever. Not this time. Looks like it's Zeppo to the rescue." He grinned. "Besides, you didn't think I'd break my word about being in My Lady's Service did you?"  
  
Angel shook his head. "You know, he's right. You can't go down there this time. Giles, can you perform the spell here?"  
  
"Yes. Just hurry."  
  
"You got it." Xander said.

Oz and Willow got into the cars and sat at the weapons consoles to give cover fire for Giles

(still working on the finale. Don't know yet how much of a doozy it will be)


	7. Victory and Twinkies

Talking quietly, Xander, Angel, and Bond made their way downstairs  
  
Xander grinned mischievously. "I forgot to make the full introductions. Angel, this is James Bond or 007. The numbers mean he has a license to kill. Bond, this is Angel. Also known as Angelus, cursed with a soul for trying to drink a gypsy. I call him Deadboy. Just make sure he doesn't make love to anyone and he won't lose the soul again..."  
  
"Do you really have to be this annoying?" Angel growled.  
  
"I can be worse."  
  
"He lost his soul?"  
  
"He wasn't allowed to have a moment of true happiness. He got it anyway."  
  
"I'm right here you know." Angel growled again.  
  
"I can smell you, of course I know."  
  
Buffy turned from keeping an eye out at the sound of a snarl of rage.  
  
- - - - - - -  
  
Mr. Harris was weak from the loss of blood. He could also swear he was hallucinating. That couldn't be his son rolling out of an alcove pounding on an older man. Then he blinked. Was that a shotgun?  
  
Blasts filled the air, as caped figures were blown in half by the blasts of both Bonds and Xanders shotguns. As they were engaged, a portal started to open. A giant head started to peek out. Mr. Harris screamed. Bond looked over, then ran forward taking off his coat as he did. Xander aimed and fired, hitting the head. As it was knocked halfway back through the portal, Bond draped the coat over it. Then he pressed a button, and dove toward Mr. Harris. Cutting him loose, he dragged him clear. The explosion blasted pieces of whatever it was all over the place. At that point, the spell Giles was casting closed the portal. Predictably, in the Scooby's case anyway, the mansion started to tremble. Bond threw the unconscious man at Angel, who caught him and ran up the stairs. Xander and Bond followed. Everyone else had already gotten in the cars. Though, Willow and OZ were holding on to each other in fear as Buffy sat in the drivers seat saying "Now, how does this start?"  
  
Xander ran up to the door. "Buffy, no offense, but the purpose of escaping a deadly situation is to live till the next night. Maybe later James will teach you how to drive."  
  
"FINE!" She moved over to the passenger seat. Giles hopped in Bond's car. And they all drove out the hole in the gate wall and down the road. As for the mansion, it did not crumble as expected.  
  
Giles adjusted his glasses. "I didn't think it would disappear."  
  
"Why not?" Angel asked.  
  
"The person who owns it is probably going to move in at some point. We need to prepare for that."  
  
"And who..."  
  
"Dracula. No telling when he'll arrive though. No sense warning Buffy yet. Research is the key."  
  
"And how..."  
  
"The writings on the wall clearly stated it as his property."  
  
"Crap!"  
  
- - - - - -  
  
"Well, that was anti-climatic." Buffy said as they were sitting in the library. Faith and Xander were, predictably, making fun of Angel. He stormed out in a huff. Buffy leaped up and ran after him, apologizing.  
  
Mr. Harris decided to keep quiet after Bond pointed a gun between his legs and said "Talk. Please." The car Bond had driven was waiting for the two new agents who had been trained in its use to arrive. Mr. Harris was on his way again.  
  
Xanders vehicle was parked in the school lot. It would eventually be transferred to the warehouse they'd used. It'd been bought by Universal Exports. Of course, in reality, it would be used to store random things that Q came up with for battle on the Hellmouth.  
  
Bond was leaning against the wall. "Xander, the Mercedes at the house is now your car. I have another on the way for my use. Both have been modified by Q with the shielding, electrical security, and some standard offenses. The other car, will be used strictly for major battles. Mine will be returned to the warehouse. Also, Q told me that the paperwork for your adoption by me has gone through."  
  
Xander stared in shock then grinned. "Does that mean I call you Double O dad?"  
  
"Funny." Bond grinned back. "Or James if you wish. It just means that your homelife is safe now. However, I am still on active duty."  
  
He paused. "I've decided to put in a basement room where two agents will be permanently stationed at the house. It'll have communications, radar, etc. If I have to leave on a mission or another reason, your two "Uncles" will be able to take care of you. They will of course be under your orders during emergency situations. You'll also have a direct communications link with Q branch. I trust you won't abuse either of these two services?"  
  
Xander nodded. "I doubt it."

"Also, M has been informed of the reality of the situation. Since you and your group succeeded in saving the world so many times She has wisely decided to keep control in the hands of you and your friends. Q branch has unofficial authority to keep you up to date on new devices. Officially, there is no such thing as a hellmouth. The British government will not be informed."

Bond continued. "When I'm around, you'll be under my command until your training is finished. Also, you are officially listed as a low classification dock worker at the warehouse, complete with pay. Everyone inside however, knows otherwise. This is your cover should one of MI-6's enemies find it. There's also a back-up location under a different company name founded by one of the millionaire's I've had chance to be in contact with during my missions. It has duplicate equipment to what's here, and She's decided that what she doesn't know, she can't reveal. You also have a backup file there as an employee should the warehouse ever be compromised. It's based across town. I haven't yet decided to put Buffy, Willow, Oz, Giles, or Faith on the payroll yet. However, the salary you'll make is enough to distribute among them with enough left over for college and what luxuries you desire... Do keep in mind though, that I plan on spoiling you, so don't spend it if you can get it from me."  
  
Cordelia walked in at that point. "Well, if it isn't loser boy." Then she blinked as everyone laughed at her.  
  
Bond looked over at her. "I think I'll talk M into giving you hazard pay as well, Xander."  
  
Principal Snyder was working in his office when he heard laughter. He stalked into the library. "Do you have to be loud? Alexander, if you're this energetic, maybe I ought to have more homework assigned to you."  
  
Bond glared. "And maybe I ought to inform the school board about your various illegal activities that you hid oh so well that it took me ten seconds instead of two to dig them up."  
  
Snyder backed up quickly. "Just keep it quiet. I'll let you go this time Mr. Harris." And he walked out.  
  
Xander looked over. "What illegal activities?"  
  
"I don't know yet. But it did take 10 seconds to find out, didn't it?"  
  
Everyone laughed again as Buffy stalked back in. "Did you have to treat him like that?"  
  
"Who, deadboy? I'm just humbling him. As long as he doesn't lose his soul again, I won't do anything worse."  
  
Buffy gaped. "You fought side by side by him!"  
  
"And who do you think asked me to dust him if he ever lost his soul again!" Xander yelled.  
  
Two people in suits walked in at that point. "Um, Mr. Bond?"  
  
Both James and Xander said in unison "Yes?" Then they looked at each other and laughed again.  
  
Mr. Harris was finally taken away.  
  
- - - - - - -  
  
Snyder finally left around 2am. All that paperwork had taken a toll. Not to mention the fact he had to find out where all his secrets were. Bond went on patrol with Buffy and Oz, while Xander took Willow and Giles home. Giles took some Excedrin and went to sleep.  
  
"Xander, you said you were in your lady's service?"  
  
"Yes."  
  
"Who is it?"  
  
Xander looked over with a twinkle. "You of course."  
  
- - - - - -  
  
The next day Snyder was introduced to Xander's new father, and his two brothers. He swore they didn't look anything alike. However, after what Mr. Bond had told him the night before, he wasn't going to say anything.  
  
Everyone gathered in the library.  
  
"Snackage anyone?" Xander had brought twinkies. Everyone grabbed them leaving him with only one.  
  
"The Twinkie is not enough dang it!" He yelled, laughing. Everyone laughed back.  
  
(I will continue this series in a sequel... But first, I need to go back and watch the seasons again. I'm no longer familiar enough with most of the episodes to continue this right now. The only one, that I've seen enough, is the Zombie bomb episode. This series is not ended.)


	8. The Past

As he stood out in the sun while the crew added on to the house, Bond reflected on the past. Especially what the previous M had told him, after MoneyPenny left and a new one took on her codename.  
  
Admiral Sir Miles Messervey or M as everyone in the organization knew him, heard MoneyPenny speak to 007 as he left. Though he didn't hear the words, they were definitely harsh. He pressed a button.  
  
"MoneyPenny, could you come in here please." He heard her shuffling around, then a "Yes sir."  
  
She walked in, sharply dressed as ever. Whatever had passed between her and his favorite agent had left its mark on her face despite her attempts to show otherwise.  
  
"Please explain the conversation that were having outside, I seem to be in the dark." He said.  
  
She sighed. "I told him I want to be with him, and that I can't handle knowing that his luck will one day run out. He told me that all I had to do was ask, but only if I could accept what he has to do on every mission." She crossed her arms. "I couldn't, and then I called him some nasty names. I doubt he'll ever look at me the same way again. I probably won't even see that little flip of the hat onto the hat rack he does anymore."  
  
The Admiral looked at her. Then he spoke. "Many reach the point you have, and they retired soon after."  
  
"But..."  
  
"With pay for services rendered, sent in full to their accounts each month for as long as they live. Also, should we ever need you, you would be on call. Same goes if you need us. The access number you receive will be yours alone. Furthermore, should our communication codes change, yours will stay the same so you won't have any problems calling. It'd probably be best this way, unless you can do as James said."  
  
"I can't."  
  
"You have as much time as you need to say goodbye to those you wish, but someone else will be taking over your duties. I'm sure you understand."  
  
She sighed again. "Yes..." Then started walking out. "I wonder if I will find someone that makes me feel like he made me feel."  
  
"And that was the everything, 007. I felt you should know. As you know however, I'm not in the habit of divulging private conversations. So please don't announce it. Now, on to this new problem that has arisen..."  
  
- - - - - -  
  
Bond shook his head. She didn't have to leave. He'd have acted the same toward her. Then again however, her son wouldn't have been born if she hadn't found someone to marry. Then where would Buffy be? Zeppo he was, but he kept her alive for them all. Despite the fact he did it out of friendship, and from what James understood a little bit of a crush as well.  
  
James turned toward the sound of a Mercedes being driven above the speed limit. Around fifteen miles above it. He grinned. Xander was definitely a happy teenager, in spite of everything. 


End file.
